Hello!

My mom was a cocaine addicted stripper, so my body hates me. Nothing TOO serious yet though, but one lung breathes slower than the other (I smoke, too... I don't listen), I have endometriosis (infertility and painful girl stuff), and now the doctors have me worried about thyroid cancer. Ah! Psychologically, I have migranes and was once diagnosed with manic depression. I haven't been on any medication for a year, and generally I'm still okay.

I have four people I talk to. No one else. I'm open with everyone, and if you sit down with me for two hours I can make you feel like you know me. It's too hard to keep track of everyone as individuals, though. So, I meet people, socializing like we're old friends or whatever, but not many people can make an impact I guess, or rather, involve themselves in the effort it takes to be my friend (I think of friends as kinds of marriages, special links in people that require time and effort, not just anyone you get along with, you know?). Like I said, I talk to four people regularly, genuinly locked into their lives. Everyone else I pay attention to, but just add interesting details into the back of my mind just in case we meet again (which, most of the time, we don't).

I am very interested in culture, religion, and psychology. I want to know how people work intellectually. Why do people have the ideas and thoughts they have? Why can someone believe in something so much, and follow all the rules, but not have any proof of the promised outcome?

I like anatomy.

I like crime. Big crime. Like CIA stuff. Yeah...

I work at Blockbuster because I like movies so much, that I can sit and watch 15 movies a week. I'm cheap though, so I actually never rented from Blockbuster because it wasn't free before I worked there. Weird, huh?

If I could support myself right now, I'd disown my family. I don't hate them, they just aren't good people.

I used to be lost. Like, living in my car, only working to pay for drugs, losing interest in anything lost. That was exactly a year ago this month... I feel amazing today. One year... it's so short of a time period, and I'm nto sure what happened, but everything has completely changed... inside and out. I love my life, no matter what unlucky things happen to still be thrown at me. I have a purpose. I am obviously not dead, in jail, or living on the streets for a reason. I admit I hate working, and I don't know why we should pay for things etc. but since it is what I'm supposed to do, I do it. Eventually I'll wind up somewhere, right?

I am not made for college. I tried it for a year and bailed. In January I start massage therapy school. It's a nine month program and include a license and a job right after graduation. I'd love to work two hours a day five days a week and support myself. OMG.

I don't even know why I'm still writing. I haven't said anything basic. Haha! I'm going to eat though. Tata! Shary
 

on Sunday, 3 September 2006, Anie said

Shary, another big warm welcome from me, too, although we've already met. Thanks so much for your introduction and I'm really happy to have so many interesting people here... everyone, really!
 

on Sunday, 3 September 2006, Stephanie said

Hello, Shary. ^^ I totally agree with you about the friends thing. They ARE supposed to be really here for you, and you for them. Anyway, welcome to JellowCat!